Design into the unknown

There is nothing new to me anymore. Everything seems down like I am lost in a universe of thought and there is no one to find me in this vast expanse. I know not anything about the future or the past it seems long forgotten. I want to find something that I can enjoy but I can't seem to. It is like I am so very confused I do not even know what I want. I would not even wish for anyone to be my friend as I would just confuse them too and they might end up like me. I do not know the purpose of my life and I am starting to wonder if I will ever know. There is something very important I have lost and I can't seem to find it. What can I do? Where can I go? What lies beyond these thoughts?